NUMB, but still here
I’ve been working nonstop. Not because I’m thriving—but because it’s the only way I know how to survive right now.
If I stop moving, I feel everything.
The betrayal. The loneliness. The way he left me while I’m pregnant. The way he came back without apology. The way I keep trying to understand why—even though deep down, I know I never will.
I’ve become so numb, I don’t even recognize myself sometimes. I’m functioning, sure. On paper, I’m “getting things done.” But emotionally? I’m underwater.
Numb isn’t peace. It’s the absence of pain only because the pain is too loud to hear all at once.
I don’t even know what to call this chapter of my life—survival? Delay? Disassociation?
I’m just trying to make it to the next morning without crying.
Trying to be strong for a baby I’m bringing into a world that feels anything but safe.
Trying to make sense of how someone who claimed to love me could leave me at my most vulnerable.
But I know I’m not the only one who’s ever felt like this. So I’ll ask:
What do you do when you're numb? When you're in the tunnel and can’t see the light yet?
How do you survive the nights when everything feels heavy and hopeless?
Comment. Message me. Share if you’ve been here.
Let’s stop pretending we’re all okay when we’re barely holding it together.
